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Life can be challenging and, even with our best efforts, we can have difficulty sorting through our own challenges. Let us help. Sometimes, having an impartial listener can help. Whether you're anxious, depressed or trying to sort through relationship difficulties, our therapists are trained to give you our full attention and help you find the solutions that work for you.

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OVER-SCHEDULED?

Posted on March 11, 2010 by Carol in Personal Issues

As a result of our cultural desire to be “productive” all the time, we’re creating a nation of people whose minds take temporary, mandatory vacations. You may believe–and have been told this by parents, bosses and the media–that you need to make the most of your time. What’s not addressed in this is the brain work that’s done in down time. Play time. We have a bunch of folks who get lost at random moments because they need idle time.

With a slew of people in struggling relationships–and on psychological medication–less scheduled might be a good thing.

Ever find yourself at a red traffic light in the front of a line of cars…and you drift in the moment while you’re waiting for it to change? You’re lost in thought and don’t see the green signal, earning a honk from the individuals in vehicles behind you–those also driven to make their schedules. Your brain has just taken a holiday. Maybe you’re worrying about what has yet to be done in your day or maybe you’re just gone.

Do you find yourself wandering through the grocery store, staring at the items there, but unseeing? Others may steer their carts around you, muttering, if you’re blocking the aisle. Go to an upscale grocery store on the weekends or evenings and you’ll find the parking lot packed with expensive cars and the aisles stocked with staring CEOs and doctors. Lost in the moment.

Find yourself dreaming about a retirement that enables you to rest? To not get up with an alarm clock’s buzz and to do just what you really want to do? This is a fantasy for many; the hope of quitting their jobs and having no demands on their time. Sadly, the Wall Street crash and our challenged economy is leaving high and dry some individuals who bartered their working years for the dream of a golden retirement with no demands.

Many have bought into the idea that “doing nothing” is a shameful waste of time. The same individuals fill their children’s after-school hours with sports, productive activities and classes. They say they don’t want the kids to be bored, but they’re sending a message to the young. This approach is further validated by the demand on college applications for a wealth of extra-curricular pursuits. Kids are supposed to start non-profit organizations for the homeless and raise money for Haitian relief…all the while taking Advanced Placement classes and earning excellent grades.

We’re raising a nation of depressed individuals who don’t know how to play. Adults seek release from their stresses by indulging in alcohol or in smoking pot. They don’t know how to disconnect otherwise.

Our over-scheduling mania spills over onto our children, too. We don’t encourage children to enjoy simple activities. There’s not time to just play. Play is a creative, brain-building activity that requires minimal structure. Given a toy car, a puzzle or a Slinky, young children get lost in play. They find new ways to explore simple objects. But this is the kind of play that is no longer typical. We want them to be productive. We buy them toys to enhance their vocabulary or build their problem-solving skills, not realizing that these skills are learned in unstructured, undirected time.

They need to play.

We need to play. However you define this–whatever is renewing to you–play is important. Don’t think your brain doesn’t need unguided moments to wander off. You’ll find it doing that at random moments anyway if you don’t let yourself disconnect.

Turn off the cell phone. Watch silly television, if you like. Parachute out of planes. Grow a garden–not because it’s the green thing to do, but because you like playing in the dirt.

Let yourself play.

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