This is never a good idea. It’s usually said to crow about the speaker being right while the other person is wrong. And maybe she is wrong, but by saying you knew better all along, you only trigger defensiveness in the other person and–worse–you become a distraction. Whether this involves a friend, a partner or a […]
Parenting is tough and even when they are adults, we parents want to tell our kids to “Watch out!” when a waterfall is ahead or a big stumbling block we see with flashing neon signs. Be it job or romantic partners, we feel the need to warn our children of trouble in front of them. The problem […]
Every so often, couples find themselves–or choose–a marriage that isn’t romantic. Usually not physical, these marriages may be chosen out of financial need or a desire for companionship not accompanied by the desire for physical intimacy. Often, however, the roommate marriage isn’t chosen by both partners and clearly defined. I usually see partners who are unsatisfied that […]
Short answer? Because it’s the client’s right to decide when they come in and when they don’t. Of course, no-showing or multiple cancellations in less than 24 hours means I won’t be able to hold the client’s appointment time and may not give them first call on rescheduling. I might not reschedule them, at all. […]
I am frequently told by new clients that they’re afraid they are nuts. With symptoms of anxiety and depression–often aided by a Google search that turns up distressing diagnoses–clients often come into my office thinking they are crazy. While I don’t specialize in those who are out-of-touch with reality, I’ve seen my share throughout the duration of my […]
This is graduation and wedding season. This is a good time to address an important subject. There’s something going on that we ought to talk about. Many members of our society have embraced an “achievement obsession” mentality. Those who haven’t devoted their lives to achieving have often fallen into the “loser” category, some giving up and giving in. […]
I have noticed for a while that some very successful, highly-accomplished individuals aren’t satisfied with all they’ve achieved. Doctors, lawyers, folks with Ph.D.s and people who’ve made a lot of money often seem ancy to achieve more. This is interesting to me, particularly since I often see individuals of this bent on the other end […]
When I point out to clients–who feel responsible for their children, mates, siblings and parents–that they are only responsible for doing their part in relationships, they initially think I’m trying to give them a pass. Nope. Doing your part means handling your own stuff, confronting your own delusions and changing your behavior. This is hard […]
In a troubled relationship, this is the reason most frequently given for not getting a divorce/separating. It is also one of the worst reasons. Don’t get me wrong, loving your kids and always considering how your choices will effect them is a big part of parenting. But don’t let yourself believe that your children aren’t impacted […]
More bad things happen in relationships when couples are drinking. This is not at all to say that everyone who enjoys an alcoholic beverage has a drinking problem. When issues in relationships–and all relationships sometimes have issues–are not dealt with openly and effectively, they tend to rear up ugly heads when alcohol is consumed. Part […]