Hard is no fun, but taking the easy road will buy you some ugly consequences. Whether we’re talking relationships or jobs, be suspicious of those that don’t require anything from you. Nothing that comes cheap is worth much.
This isn’t to say you should climb Everest or look for impossible suitors. Just know that easy breezy is a great look, but not a great motto. Don’t sell yourself short. You can do the hard stuff that’s worth doing. You can earn the degree that will net you the career you want and you can face fears that have haunted you too long.
Doing scary, hard things doesn’t require you to be particularly fearless, it just takes you moving forward even though you’re afraid. Heros aren’t built with no fear; they do what needs to be done inspite of fear. Believing in yourself isn’t having a lack of doubt–most of us doubt ourselves, at times. The belief part comes from considering that you might have what it takes to do what you know needs to be done.
There are tons of things that aren’t particularly fun, but which can get you into a better place–interviewing for a job you want, going on a first date with someone in whom you’re interested, completing a degree. None of these are easy, but all can be worthwhile.
Easy as a life motto can cost big.
Taking the easy road can mean engaging in behaviors that are conflict-avoidant. Get real. Conflict is a part of life. Avoiding conflict on principle makes you a bad bet for a relationship and a bad risk as a friend. Participating in others’ lives involves having to face unpleasant or challenging moments. You don’t have to ask for them, but conflict needs to be faced when it arises.
It takes courage to admit the truth when a lie looks like the way to avoid consequences. The problem with this choice is that consequences are vital to the learning process. You need them to get verification for the right steps and realization of the wrong steps. Whether your cheating your way through an exam or a relationship, you’re risking yourself. Facing up to the music can be ugly, but not facing it is even uglier.
Risk big; earn big. The harder moments in life usually involve lessons you need to learn. Go there. Believe in yourself enough to jump the high hurdles–tell your mate your true feelings. Tell your boss if you think you can handle the promotion. Tell the truth.
Ask yourself questions, even though you’re afraid of the answers. Be brutal. The pay-off is that you’re better equipped to handle the hard stuff. Knowing yourself will enable you to make better choices and take bigger risks with others. Don’t put off paying the piper. You can handle this. You can do the hard thing. Be honest with yourself about what’s really at risk and what you’re really afraid of. You don’t get to make others take the risks they ought to take, but you are responsible for the ones you avoid or embrace.
Moral courage is a tough choice, but you’ll feel better about yourself at the end of the day.
Easy isn’t easy. You may push your consequences off until another day, but they come roaring back, bigger and badder than ever. Do the hard thing–the right thing, now.