Contrary to some opinions, men and women can be friends. Sex can be terrific fun, but that doesn’t mean that all possible sexual partners turn you on. Sometimes, you just like another person apart from any interest in seeing him naked.
Men and women can be friends. This doesn’t usually work if they just broke up, however, or if one half of the equation hopes to get back together in a romantic involvement. Some people do form workable friendships after they’ve broken up, but most just shift into a relationship-never-land that doesn’t help anyone move forward. Separation–disconnecting all the aspects of couplehood–is a complicated challenge. Trying to shift gears from romantic partnership to friendship takes time.
But what if you’ve never been more than friends? What if you’re with a partner and your friends are just friends. This can be challenging, too, because it can feel threatening to your partner. Particularly when the relationship has issues to resolve and, basically, all relationships have these, at various times.
But if you’re an individual who’s always felt more comfortable with friends of the opposite sex, it doesn’t seem weird at all.
You need to remember that lots of couples were friends before they began a romantic relationship and many individuals say their romantic partner is their best friend. So, the issue gets murky.
If, though, you’re genuinely not interested in dating your friend, you need to remember several important aspects of this issue. Secrecy is scary. It conveys significance and line-crossing behavior. Think about things you hide. When there isn’t a reason, you don’t worry about keeping a secret. If you’re not open, your partner will think some thing’s going on. Emotional intimacy requires openness. If you’re not telling your partner about interactions and/or significant conversations you have with your opposite sex friend, your partner’s going to get nervous.
Let your friendship be transparent. Invite your partner to be involved with your friend. Maybe he’s not into pool-like you enjoy with your friend–or he doesn’t get into horseback riding or rugby. He might not be interested in the activities you enjoy, but talking naturally about what you do and inviting him along, when appropriate, will go a long way to making this a non-issue.
The most important thing you can do to address this issue, though, is to connect more intimately with your partner. The two of you need to maximize your communication and your enjoyment of one another. Then, it’s not a big deal if your friend is a guy or a girl.