Listening doesn’t mean offering your opinion, but that’s what most of us do. When clients tell me they’ve listened to their mates or children and then told them what to do, I know the mate or child probably didn’t feel heard at all. Clients tell me all the time about their frustration in trying to sort […]
Guess what? Most people don’t even notice your screw ups, your non-matching socks and your awkward pauses. This can be very hard to believe, but the truth is that most other folk are so caught up in their own stuff, they don’t generally notice yours. While there may have been a handful of beautiful people […]
Sidle up here and listen closely. You may have lots of stuff going on in your relationship, but most couples who I see have some general themes. While there are women who want more sex from their husbands, it’s more often the reverse. Despite these having shifted some, the sex roles in our society are […]
I don’t think anyone lives a perfect life. Some are more charmed than others, born into healthy homes with love and no financial hardships, but that still doesn’t make living on this earth easy. Even the rich and famous have their challenges and it seems to me that learning how to face these is the […]
Being a teen isn’t easy. Being the parent of a teen is really hard, too. Few things are more intimate and up close than being parent and kid. You live together; you see each other at your worst and best. The process of parenting is way complicated when you consider that the kiddo generally came […]
This business of forgiving others is very tricky. Everyone is sometimes victimized. It’s in the nature of this world and, therefore, the issue of forgiveness is big. The offenses done to you can range from being the victim of a crime(robbery, assault, abuse or rape) to facing betrayal by a loved one(being cheated on by a lover or lied to […]
I’ve been married for 35 years and I still like him, which I think gives me the right to discuss this topic, even if I weren’t a therapist. Just to be clear, you can love a person and not like him, so the liking part is pretty darned good. Valentine’s Day is the time of […]
When I got a fun, new car, a friend asked me for to take him for a ride in it. I did this, but it simply didn’t occur to me to offer to let him drive. I’m like that sometimes–clueless. I loved that others enjoyed the car, but it just didn’t occur to me to […]
Dr. Carol “Our son Ethan is 3 yrs old and when my husband asks for him to give him a kiss or hug him, he refuses. He will easily give me kisses and hugs though. It seems like they are already starting to butt heads. My husband tends to use an authoritarian style parenting. He […]
Making enough to keep a roof over your head and food on the table is good, but the time may come when you want more. Some individuals just fall into jobs and while these fit some, others feel trapped. Some individuals believe they can’t make the same amount of money at any other job. People […]