This is a complicated, often cruel world and it’s really easy to lash out at others. I was struck when recently after Robin William’s suicide that his daughter, Zelda, announced she was getting off social media platforms because she’d been receiving ugly, hateful messages blaming her (somehow) for her father’s sad decision. The issue of […]
Some think power is an ugly word, but we all crave the experience of what we say and do mattering. That’s power. There are two kinds–personal power(which we all need) and power in relationships(which is massively important). Every human experience has to do with this need and the biggest misunderstanding comes from thinking you can […]
Lots of people have reasons to be depressed–troubled relationships, money problems, loss of a loved one, or poor health. And then some struggle with depression with they have no visible reason to feel so badly. Depression is defined as a loss of pleasure, low mood and low self-esteem. For some time now, the medical and psychiatric establishment has diagnosed […]
I’m going out on a limb here, but I’m don’t believe most emotional issues have to last a lifetime. Clients come into my office all the time saying they’ve been given a diagnosis–usually by a medical person–and told that whatever behavior they are dealing with is disabling and unchangeable. It will last a lifetime. I’m not a big fan […]
The fear of this is one of the most frequently cited reasons for staying in unhappy relationships. It is very challenging to be with another person–to deal with conflicts and disagreements–but many of us would rather do that than live our lives without a committed partner. Some individuals say they stay in miserable relationships because they’ve “known each other so […]
We humans have amazing minds, but pretending trauma or abuse didn’t happen, doesn’t erase the impact. It’s understandable that we totally want to forget these ugly things happened, particularly because victims often blame themselves. Even when professionals insist they are absolutely not responsible for the horrible things they suffered, victims continue to feel they should have done […]
Guess what? Most people don’t even notice your screw ups, your non-matching socks and your awkward pauses. This can be very hard to believe, but the truth is that most other folk are so caught up in their own stuff, they don’t generally notice yours. While there may have been a handful of beautiful people […]
This business of forgiving others is very tricky. Everyone is sometimes victimized. It’s in the nature of this world and, therefore, the issue of forgiveness is big. The offenses done to you can range from being the victim of a crime(robbery, assault, abuse or rape) to facing betrayal by a loved one(being cheated on by a lover or lied to […]
Making enough to keep a roof over your head and food on the table is good, but the time may come when you want more. Some individuals just fall into jobs and while these fit some, others feel trapped. Some individuals believe they can’t make the same amount of money at any other job. People […]
Put a bunch of relatives together who have unresolved business, add in high expectations and you’ve got a holiday gathering that results in hurt feelings all around. The most joyous time of the year… If alcohol and firearms are involved, this can be a deadly time of the year. You have the highest expectations of […]